Sunday, November 9, 2008

A Few Letters.

Dear Netflix -

I wish my free trial subscription would go on forever and ever. I am just too cheap to pay for you.

Thanks,
The cheapest girl ever girl who prefers Target to Netflix.

Dear Public Library -

Thank you for being you and providing me with endless great books and movies.

Mwah,
A satisfied customer

Dear November -

I feel like you just started. What's up with it being the ninth already? SLOW DOWN.

- An anti-winter enthusiast.

Dear NaBloPoMo -

This isn't too bad, but I hate barely having enough time to check my friends' blogs and their awesome writing.

- A Drained Blogger.

Dear Husband -

Thank you for being patient with my blogging. Even when I say, "Just got home but I have to write a blog post!" and make you go read a book instead of talking to me.

- Your Wife.

Dear Self -

That previous letter is a sign that you need to get your priorities in order. Stat. Your husband is quite adorable - pay attention to him.

Love,
Your Biggest Fan.

Dear Ohio State University-

You are so big you scare me. And so vehemently anti-the-entire-STATE-of-Michigan it makes me want to poke you in the eyeball.

- Just because I'm from Ohio doesn't mean I have to love you. Or put that "The" in front your name.

Dear Future -

If you could arrange for me to get my graphic design degree while working part time at Starbucks, that'd make me happy.

High hopes,
Ashley

PS: Also - expect a nose piercing if you get me out of the professional world.

Dear Friends and Family -

Please don't judge my ambitions or cluck your tongue at me wanting to work at Starbucks.

- Wanna-Be Hippie-Slash-Free Spirit.

Dear Starbucks -

I love you. Give me free lattes and great benefits.

- An Obsessed Future Employee.

Dear Weekend -

I beg you, please don't leave me.

- Ashley

23 comments:

  1. Absolutely hilarious. Great, great writing!

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  2. Can you write a letter to my future and tell them that I want a baby, a bookstore/coffee shop and a degree in world religions, philosophy, photography, and some kind of design?

    You have a direct line to the universe I am sure.

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  3. Oh and a degree in History as well. K Thanks!

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  4. I especially love the last letter, seeing as that's exactly how I feel every. single. Sunday. night.

    Although, having Tuesday off this week takes the edge off a bit.

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  5. Hi. This is probably one of the best blog posts I've ever read. You captured so much reality with the wryest, most honest humor in the simplest ways possible. And I still think we're kindred spirits, with the wannabe-hippie, I'd-rather-be-graphic-designing thoughts.

    But, I do get away with a nose ring, tongue ring, and (recently!) blue hair in the corporate world. I'm lucky that advertising is a "creative" business... ha.

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  6. I'm telling you this blog-cation is the best thing I've ever done. My hubby loves the extra attention, and I love the time away from the computer. While it might not last forever, it definitely helps bring life back into perspective.

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  7. Similarly, I also steadfastly refuse to put "the" in front of "ohio state university." How incredibly egotistical can an institution BE!?

    Or should I say, "Could they BE any more egotistical?!" a la Chandler. Mmm. Must go watch Friends instead of cleaning or being productive. Ta-ta!

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  8. Let me know if you hear back from the weekend about not leaving, I would like to speak to him/her too.

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  9. I love, love, love these letters!

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  10. I'm very worried you will bounce off the walls if you work at Starbucks. . . but also curious to see what that would look like!!!

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  11. LOVE this post. think i may steal the idea sometime.
    you are too cute

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  12. I've been thinking about the peppermint mochas at Starbucks all weekend. Need. Now. That's all. Funny letters!

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  13. I found myself nodding my head to quite a few of these as I read them tonight. You're fabulous, if you didn't know already!

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  14. Nose piercing? Really? Go for it. I had mine pierced for my last year of college, took it out when I got my Real Job and now? I want it back!

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  15. you'd look adorable with a little nose piercing!

    and you just made me want to go to the public library asap. i used to go all the time. but now? i can't remember the last time i've been.

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  16. aww that was really cute! Well written!

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  17. You are the cutest! I love these letters of yours!

    And you should totally get your nose pierced so we can be twinsies!

    I miss you too! How bout you come move to California and then we'll be next door neighbors and we'll bake yummy veggie food and run around and dance to silly music and go shopping at Target and we'll have the best of times!

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  18. p.s. Can't wait to hear how your Cleveland blogger meeting goes! I know you're going to have so much fun!

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  19. love this..... so great!! i'm going to be upset when my year of netflix runs out it was a gift for last xmas!

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  20. Oh, definitely reconsider Twilight.

    From everything I've heard lately, it's fabulous!

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  21. you are just so darn adorable, i love you!! :D come work at starbucks....preferably one in fresno? hee. yeah right.

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  22. I used to have a really cute nose ring, a diamond stud. *sigh* Corporate America forced me to take it out. And I also echo tipp- please write the future and tell it that I also want a baby, and to be a succesful professor, speaker and published author, and still look like I'm 25 when I'm 40. k thanks. :)

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  23. these letters cracked me up ... especially the one about THE Ohio State University. I'm from Michigan, and despite the long-standing rivalry, never quite understood the deep-seeded hatred. ah well. thanks for making me laugh! : )

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